I recently went on my first solo car camping trip. Just me, a car full of chaos, my trusty travel buddy (a stuffed donkey sasshole obviously), and the wide open road. I had ideas about what this trip would be like—peaceful, empowering, maybe a little Instagram-worthy (I failed).
And while there were peaceful and empowering moments, there were also a lot of “WTF am I doing?” moments. So here’s the honest recap. What I learned, what I liked and hated, and how I’m adjusting for next time.
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Sometimes you hit a wall. Life, with all its chaos and expectations, just feels like a never-ending loop of “WTF am I even doing?” That is me these days. Burnt out, stretched thin, and craving some kind of sign from the universe and trying to find my true self.
So, I said “f*ck it” and packed my bags. Just me, a few too many snacks, and a vague plan to drive until I felt something again. Spoiler alert: I found a hell of a lot more than I expected.
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In late 2016 I made a major change in my life. Removing something that was turning me into a person that I did not want to be. It wasn’t easy, but it was so worth it.
The below post was written shortly before I walked away from one of the most toxic situations I have ever experienced. I saved it so that if I ever questioned the decision I made, I could remember how I felt. Regardless of the “logical” pros and cons, how I felt MATTERS. I MATTER.
I’m sharing it now because I want you to know – if you are EVER in a situation that makes you feel like this (whether it’s a relationship a job or anything else), find a way to GET OUT. It’s worth it. You deserve it. You’ve got this.
Recently I braved the frigid cold of Chelsea Michigan on a Saturday morning with an adventure pal of mine to take our first class at Breathe Yoga Chelsea. I say adventure pal, because this whole yoga thing is a stretch (pun intended) for two fluffy, non-bendy old ladies. We were not sure what to expect, and were a little nervous – were we wearing the right thing? Would we be faced with judgy flexible yoga people who were appalled that we could barely get our jackets off without breathing heavy, let alone touch our toes?
Walking in the front door, the immediate greeting from desk personnel was a warm smile and encouraging words, and I thought…this might be ok.
Matt was our instructor, and he assured us that there would be modified poses for those of us who were a little “challenged” by the moves in his class. He was kind, and very understanding of our limitations. Before class we discussed the alternate moves and what we could expect.
And then we got started!
Those who know me in person are most likely aware that I am an “out loud observer”. So throughout the class, I had an extremely difficult time listening, as I was expending so much energy simply trying to keep my mouth shut. Don’t judge, we all have traits we need to work on. I will proudly say, that only ONCE did a “yeah, sure we will” escape my filter in response to the instruction.
The class was certainly challenging, even in the modified poses – but I know that very often things that are difficult for me are things that I just need to practice more. And I definitely need more flexibility – in mind, body and life in general.
One thing my adventure pal and I agree on, is that we will arrive much earlier for our next class at Breathe Yoga Chelsea – because the only thing worse than being a fluffy, non-bendy old lady in a yoga class, is doing it in front of the rest of the class, right next to the instructor. (kind as Matt is, I’m pretty sure he didn’t enjoy my “yoga face”. Gah.)
Bottom line? Breathe Yoga Chelsea was a warm, inviting and challenging environment – exactly what this fluffy lady needed, and I can’t wait for round 2. Thank you for that Breathe Yoga staff!!
(Image by Burrill Strong, courtesy of Breathe Yoga Chelsea, used with permission)
